Yes, it’s real

Wrong. So very, very, wrong.

But first… today was a big day. Not in that I did anything amazing, but my two presentations were scheduled at my conference. Both went pretty well. Big news was that I got a Outstanding Paper Award for my work with Daniela and Michael which was very nice. And no… it wasn’t like an encouragement award where everyone got one. Only 3 were handed out to the couple hundred papers. So virtual high fives all round.

But that’s not what you come to my blog for. You want to know “so Matt… did you do something stupid today?”. And today, the answer is… yes.

I was planning on going back to the baseball, however the storms that arrived put an end to that. Oh well. A quiet night in wasn’t going to be a bad thing. So I grabbed a bite to eat in the hotel bar. “Boo!” I hear you say. “Boring!”. Kind of. But I did have this for dinner…

Buffalo girls go round the outside

Yes, a burger. But a buffalo burger! Made from 100% authentic bison. Mmmm. It was pretty tasty too. I expected the taste to be stronger (having eaten a moose burger in the past) but really, it was just pretty burgerish. Good though.

So I thought that was going to be the extent of my evening. Maybe watch the ball on TV and try and get some early shut-eye. Then it dawned on me. BACON SUNDAE. Yes. So off I legged it to Burger King.

I gotta admit, I was getting pretty excited as I got there and opened the door. I could see the ice cream machine in action so I wasn’t going to be denied this time. Take two… “One Bacon Sundae please!”. “That will be $2.15 thanks sir”. Over I handed my greenbacks and oh boy… the tension was palpable!

I shall keep this receipt forever

And then it arrived…

Behold! The Glory!

YES. It looked exactly as I expected. Wrong, but oh so right all at once. Bacon bits on top, with a crispy rasher of bacon sticking out the top. What kind of demented genius came up with this?!

So then I got stuck in…

Clearly I took this photo BEFORE I took a bite

First bite was interesting. It is the cold vanilla ice cream and the chocolate and caramel that hits first. I had a pang of disappointment when the bacon flavour didn’t hit. But once the ice cream started to disappear from my mouth then hit the bacon. And it was strange.

And not in a good way.

In fact as I had a few more spoonfuls, it pains me to say it, but this sundae was wrong. So very, very, wrong. You know me and my love of bacon. But this sundae really has no right to exist. It’s not as if it was all some magical combination that someone freakishly discovered and had to share the taste explosion with the world (well the US anyway). It wasn’t like the salty of the bacon was the perfect foil to the sweet. The bacon just tasted, well, fatty. It is like some deranged lunatic (probably not dissimilar to myself) thought “Hey! I wonder if we made a bacon sundae if any crazies would buy it?!”. Well the answer is yes. This one did.

So did I finish it? Of course. Even eating the crispy bacon strip, all covered in melted ice cream, caramel, and chocolate. By that point my tastebuds were all messed up, so eating the strip didn’t seem any worse than the rest.

So there you go folks. I regret nothing of course. I do this so that you guys don’t have to.